Project Runway Season 8 Finale!!!

It's finally here!!, the very last episode of Season 8 of Project Runway. But first things first, who on earth hired Jessica Simpson as one of the final judges on this most important fashion show of the whole season? I know, there's a recession going on...

Moving on, surprise! We've got an episode within an episode as Tim and Heidi introduce a Reunion special with the final three designers sitting, once again, next to the booted off contestants from Season 8. I'm happy to see everyone together again, however cringe- worthy video clips and a whole lot of tears and chit chat ensue, and all I'm thinking is when do we get to Fashion Week? when when when???
Back in the workroom the designers put the final touches on their collections, and I must point out one of Andy's looks, which is a cut out bikini bathing suit with twisted fabric pieces coming up out of the crotch. Tim thinks it looks like hair...aaaanyways, Next stop Fashion Week!

The designers arrive at Lincoln Center, and the backstage drama begins...Because I've just arrived off a long flight I'm still too wobbly to write about all that went on backstage, besides Mondo's hair coif looking sensational, so it's on to the Runway with Heidi, who by the way is wearing an all red pantsuit which irks me. She introduces the designers and the show begins with Gretchen's collection, and now I'm going to let my thoughts run free:
-The Charlie's Angels hair styling is gorgeous, and she's managed to step up her accessories styling as well with heels, hats, and sunglasses. Love the printed brown chiffon dress, but we see five more pieces coming down the runway looking pretty much the same, a bit repetitive. However I'll admit the collection is very wearable, and it's all very well edited for a clear customer in mind.

Next up is an emotional Andy, wearing those parachute pants he made for the Jackie Kennedy challenge:
-Those flower headpieces are distracting and look like antennae, but I love the rough chiffon wrap and bathing suit, very sexy. Loved the silver tone pleated top with shorts look. I don't like the pea green cigarette pants however I love his eleventh look for the last challenge, the green intricately pleated two piece dress. It felt underwhelming and way too conservative for Andy's warrior aesthetic we are used to seeing.

And last but not least is Mondo's inspired and joyful collection:
-Love the first look of the dotted blouse and shorts, but I really can't appreciate the silk screened skeleton print everyone apparently loves. My favorite look was the the plaid bubble dress, and the headpiece was a total show stopper. Sleek looking slim-fitting plaid pants and pink and silver tunic dress were some highlights. Overall the headpieces were incredible and the whole collection just felt whimsical and happy.

For me the clear winner is Mondo, simply because his collection was fun, ebullient, bright, and inspiring. Somehow I'm finding it difficult believing Heidi when she says she was 'blown' away by each collection. Really? Usually I'd dive right into discussing the judges' extensive thoughts on each designers' showing because it was quite the in depth debate, but I am regrettably still a wee bit tired (am I even typing straight?) so let's just hope you've already watched the fun bits. Basically we have a split decision between the judges. Heidi and Jessica are all for Mondo's polka dot sheath and upbeat collection, while Michael and Nina prefer the focused, effortless wearability, and clear vision of the customer Gretchen is designing for.

Drum roll please........and the winner is: Gretchen. Wow, just a few hours ago (actually most of the season) I never saw that one that coming, besides the fact that Tim once scolded her for being "manipulative and pushy." But since when does sell ability win out over wearability? I mean, how many times have we watched Michael, Nina, and Heidi choose ambitious high concept and creative collections over more sedate, sellable, and wearable ones? Darn that recession of ours, I have a wee feeling it's partly to blame.

Well Auf Wiederhosen everyone,  and I'll miss you most of all Tim!
Can't wait to bring you more drama from the next season of Project Runway....
xoxox for now,
RedPoppy

Project Runway Episode 12: I Miss You More Than Ever Christian Siriano

Designers, there are only two episodes left and I am still wondering who, out of the Final Five, will finally send something absolutely WOW down the runway!?? Who will go on to Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week? Will it be Mondo? Andy? April? Gretchen, Michael? That's a whole load of questions without any answers yet. In the meantime Heidi sends the Final Five to NYC's opulent Mandarin Oriental Hotel for some champagne, toasts, and relaxation. Nursing massive hangovers the next morning (just joking), the designers meet Mayor Bloomberg so he can present them with the final challenge: Design a look that's inspired by New York City!

With the entire City at their disposal, the designers wander around their favorite spots in search of inspiration. Michael is literally inspired by Miss Liberty's drapery, April and Mondo analyze the linear structure of the Brooklyn Bridge, Andy breathes in Central Park's nature, and Gretchen stumbles down the the Lower East Side...One last trip to Mood and someone better have some fabulous fabric hiding in their bag. Or else. And yet I'm seeing lots of boring black around the workroom, and Gretchen is designing some awful boring separates in maroon tones. Tiiiiiiiim we need you!! Finally Tim checks in and informs Michael the sea of black fabric attempting to be a dress he's working on looks like a "tortured mess." Then it's on to Andy's slutty cocktail dress and Tim warns him against going all "Real Housewives of New Jersey." Let 'em have it Tim!

Final Runway Show Time arrives and I'm absolutely dreading what the judges are about to see. I want them to be wowed, yet I'm almost certain they won't be. Almost everyone's made something safe and black, and Tim must be seething inside with disappointment. And now I'm about to have a major prophetic moment: I say out loud that I've never longed to see and hear Christian Siriano more than at this very moment. And then BAM!!!!The camera pans over to guest judge Christian Siriano and I almost fall off the couch. Just to clarify, I had ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA who the guest judge was this week. I need to take a moment......!

On the Runway: Just look at Michael's basic-looking draped black dress, for me it's so blah. Gretchen's leather jacket and skirt separates look more like career-Midtown than Lower East Side, while Andy's back-slashed warrior dress is shiny and fierce. Mondo's graphic mixed textiles dress is cute and architectural, but I don't love it, nor do I like the fit. April's gauzy dress looks like everything else she's made this season...

What do the judges think? Michael Kors loves Mondo's houdstooth/patterned dress, Nina and Christian loves Andy's edgy body-con dress, Michael Kors thinks Gretchen has ran out of steam and her look is more secretarial than downtown, and he also agrees that April has made the same joyless version of this "preganant witch" dress over and over again. And last but not least Gaaah! Michael Kors, and everyone else, loves Michael C's blah draped dress. What the hell?

After Heidi plays the annoying "which two designers should go with you to Fashion Week" game with the designers, it's the moment of truth. Who's going to Fashion Week? As the guitar strums notes of major chords in the background it's Congratulations to Michael C, Mondo, and Andy. And oh yeah, Gretchen. Auf Weederzane April, best of luck.

...And stay tuned for next time when Tim makes some house calls!!

Project Runway Episode 11: Heidi Likes It In The Workroom

Alas and alack this week Project Runway ran out of original subject ideas and decided to use Heidi Klum as the client. It turns out Heidi 'designs' a line of drab looking overpriced activewear for New Balance which is sold on Amazon.com. For this challenge each designer had to create a sportswear look for the line which, by the plain and boring looks of it, is quite convenient as Heidi is in dire need of some new interesting design ideas...
Pan to Heidi's invaluable visit to the workroom. Gretchen doesn't like her in the workroom, and quite frankly neither do I. As Heidi goes around critiquing we sample a wee bit of attitude from sweet little Mondo who snarls, rolls his eyes, and snaps back at Heidi when she questions the wearability of his too-cropped hoodie and stiff-necked blouse. In a huff Mondo decides to scrap his original design and barks at Heidi: "Maybe I'll dress my dog in it when I get home." AWKWARD!! Mondo's had an emotional few days...And then it's Gretchen's turn to flare her nostrils and disagree when Heidi criticizes her fabric choice and use of butt shirring on a pair of leggings. That tense encounter ends when Heidi walks off shrieking "Cheers!," and announces that the designers must create two additional looks (even more convenient for her HKNB New Balance line). The next surprise is the entrance of extra work reinforcements in the form of 'Outed' designers Casanova (essssactly), Ivy (ugh not again), Peach, A.J., and Valerie. And then the real drama begins with Doublesidedtapegate when bitchy and bitter Ivy accuses Michael C. of cheating on the Jackie Kennedy challenge.
Please let's just get on with the show!!!
It's Runway time, Heidi is wearing a blue sausage dress and no makeup, and guest judge is sportswear designer Norma Kamali (good choice for once). Tonight I'm going to skip the part where I share all my thoughts on the looks coming down the runway because all I see is one big billowy production of Flashdance. However I do like Mondo's pieces and Andy's clever use of chiffon and jersey in some unflattering sporty swirls. Who's going home this week? Christopher finally! For the last eight weeks he's made clothes which I can barely recall and which have bored me into a coma.
The winner is....Andy, whose sportswear designs have already been produced and featured in Heidi's New Balance line. And we're now just one episode away from Fashion Week and I still have no idea who on earth is going to Lincoln Center besides Mondo...Until next week, Auf Weederzane!!!

Project Runway Episode 8- Cheap & Ugly: The Anyone Other Than Jackie Story

"Jackie Kennedy would not have camel toe"- Tim

This epic line pretty much sums up Project Runway's latest episode where the uninspiring designers had to create a classic American sportswear look using late fashion icon Jacqueline Kennedy as inspiration (can't we just call her Jackie O?). So how hard can it be to create a look that speaks quality, taste, style, and sophistication? Apparently very, especially when the designers thought Tim said 'Cheap and Ugly' instead of
'Jackie Kennedy.'

Back in the workroom we are forced to listen as Gretchen waxes unpoetic over Mondo's fabulous fabric. But that isn't the worst part. Looking around I'm seeing oversize draped cargo pants, zebra stripes, uninspired looking cocktail dresses, and something white and blah from Ivy. And I couldn't help but wonder, how on earth will Jackie Kennedy's spirit decide which designer to haunt first?

Then Tim makes a big announcement: Create an additional Outerwear item to go with the original garment. Well that means more ugly in the workroom and another trip to MOOD. Cue to Gretchen grabbing Michael C's fabric right out of his hand and she's once again confirmed as resident evil. Back in the workroom Mondo feels like Harry Potter and Michael C is scrapping his 12th garment, to which Tim says "Egads." Also I love Tim's appreciation of Christopher's look: "The dress is so form-fitting it looks kind of anemic."

The best part about this episode? Discovering that Mondo is actually an elf. He's wearing tiny black pinstripe shorts with suspenders, cummerbund, and houndstooth check knee socks. And lots of freaky eyeliner...Then it's officially Runway time and guest judge is actress January Jones. A note to the silly producers: This actress may wear 1960's costumes on her show Mad Men but she doesn't actually have any real relevant fashion opinions.

My thoughts on the utterly unrelated Jackie Kennedy looks coming down the runway are best expressed through a soliloquy without pauses and often using the words cheap and ugly:
April's black satin zipped dress looks cheap and ugly, and so is that funereal pillbox hat on her head. Ivy's outfit is black and white and grey all over, but maybe the lesser of many ugly evils on the runway today. PS. That chiffon jacket reminds me of a giant nylon drawstring bag to hold coated almonds that they give out at weddings. Michael C's electric blue draped cocktail dress is actually sexy and lovely, for Anyone Other Than Jackie K. Is that a dead possum on Christopher's model? The dress for the most part is elegant sportswear but the shoulder wrap is plain UGly. Gretchen's disco era style brought us a zebra print ugly length skirt and halter top look, it felt cheap and embodied the spirit of Someone Other Than Jackie. Valerie's 'Brass Plum ca. 1992' dark burgundy top and black stretch skirt paired with a black zipped vest jacket was offensive, horrendous, ugly, cheap, and sad, and it sent me into a dark depression. Pass the xanax, honey better be going home this week. Andy (and his ever-changing mohawk coif) channels Rei Kawakubo and designs a camel toe-inducing curtain draped cargo pant along with ill-fitting slinky top and cheap ugly vest that even Christina Aguilera wouldn't wear, never mind Jackie K. What part of 'classic American' sportswear didn't Andy get? In fact Heidi flipped her mop-topped lid, and I've never seen this much smoke coming out of Michael Kors' ears. Michael D's design may channel 'Little White House on the Ugly' with that cheap looking layered tank top and sad looking drop-waist pleated skirt, but at least I could look at it without being repulsed. It was actually kinda cute and an outfit you might put together in the Junior section of Nordstrom. It was, in Michael Kors' words, "insulting". And Hallelujah!! Mondo's outfit was the only one that actually had anything to do with Jackie Kennedy. It was modern but clearly inspired in the right place. I loved the striped top, and the large-houndstooth check skirt was perfectly chic and stylish. Something I actually enjoyed looking at without vomiting a bit in my mouth. Contemporary Jackie Barbie achieved!
The winner of this week's challenge? Mondo of course. Glad the judges got that one right.
Who's going home? Well if it was up to me it would be Valerie for depressing the hell out of me, but it's up to Heidi, Nina, and Michael (and some useless thespianic opinion with zero fashion sense) so Michael Drummond is OUT...
Auf weederzane designers and stay tuned for next week's brand of ugly!...

Main image source: jenfitchstyle,
mylifetime.com

Project Runway Episode 7: What's Mine is Yours

Good Morning Designers! This week's challenge begins with a brunch hosted by Tim, Michael Kors, and a very large luxury boat. Can you say Resort Wear??? Each designer had to create a resort look, keeping in mind that resort wear can include anything from itsy bitsy bikinis to long flowy evening gowns. A boat ride sketching session with mimosas in hand and flashy Michael Kors sunglasses later, the relaxed designers are not ten minutes back in the workroom when Tim surprises them with the 'catch of the day': The evil velvet bag with the golden rope that Tim presides over like Professor Dumbledore with a big golden secret, reveals each designer must pair up in teams of two and execute each other's look perfectly, mimicking the designer/sample-maker relationship in the real world of garment outsourcing. And let me gleefully add that Gretchen's pairing with Casanova is made in heaven. He can barely speak English and Gretchen communicates with him using really large pencil drawings...
Tim introduces a guest critic this week and it's none other than Michael Kors! What a tremendous opportunity it is for the designers to get some real insight from a master, and MK (Michael Kors for short) does not disappoint. Some of his wise observations: Keep it youthful (Gretchen and Casanova). Keep it Modern. It's glammy puss over the top (April). Go with your gut. Move on from the bordeaux and cadet blue (Valerie), and "We judges are hem obsessed!"...Andy South's bathing beauty

It's Runway time with "stylish American actress" guest judge Kristen Bell. And that's pretty much all she is. Fashion judge? Hardly accredited, dear producers...Moving on, here are my runway thoughts in a linear fashion cloud:
Michael C- very pretty metallic jumpsuit, very Miami, love that hair
Mondo- I'm all for mixed prints but this looks like Junior Malibu BarbieMichael D- too dark and goth-like (the roped belt) for my kind of Resort wear..but the judges LOVE it. Whatever
Ivy- blah blah and more blah. Snoooore, hitting the snooze button...
Christopher- also blah, pretty printed top though, hate the shorts
April- "Punky edgy baby doll" look that Michael Kors and the judges LOOOOOVE but I'm so not liking this! Am I missing something here?
Casanova- where the heck iss da beach? Awful career suit, even for career. And where is she going with that handbag?
Gretchen- Hate those colors! And I'm so not feeling the resort
Valerie- construction was poor, camel knits were not my idea of resort, missing sexiness
Andy S- love the silky tied robe and pretty ombre effect, very elegant and flowy, swimsuit is sewn to perfection

Among the judges' wild deliberations this week, they definitely agreed with Casanova's epic struggle between prostitute and grandmotherly visions, and the clear fact that Ivy is just a good seamstress with poor design talent. The winner of this week's challenge? Monotone April. Again, not sure why the judges went cuckoo over her black widow baby doll thing, but who am I to argue with Michael Kors. And who is Out? It's CAZZZZZZANOVA!!! After all it was time for the 'dessigner' who tried to "grab New Jork by the balls". Being inspired by your grandmother is sweet, just not when you're designing a look for Resort. And by the looks of the extended emotional Casanova tribute montage at the end, it pretty much confirmed our initial suspicions that the producers kept this rubber-lipped personality around mostly for their entertainment. Until next week, auf-veederzheeeein....!April's winning design

Casanova is Out

Project Runway Season 8 Episode 1 Premieres: And Sew It Begins

Hello Designers! Project Runway Season 8 is finally here and Heidi (with a questionable new shag 'do') and the gang are back with a new crop of aspiring attention grabbers (most of them over 12 years old this season which pleases me greatly) and a load of new 'Twists'! Our new group of 17 designers gather at NYC's newly minted Fashion stage Lincoln Center for their first challenge where Heidi and Tim confess that it was nearly impossible to narrow down the group to 16 because they were all so darn good. So their first challenge actually becomes the final stage of the audition process! No one is safe! And that's Twist #1.
Let me just note one designer who already stands out: Casanova and his impossibly tight red pants who is "taking New Jork by the balls..." I love him already and so will the producers when they make sure he sticks around for many episodes to come...

And now for the first challenge each designer must go hunting in their tightly packed suitcases for one item of clothing which they will incorporate into their first garment. Twist #2: they must pass their beloved item to the person on the right. Darn! There goes Casanova's very very expensive pair of Dolce & Gabbana pants. Twist #3: They only have 5 hours to complete their garment.

Back at the Parsons ranch we are all surprised to see that MOOD fabrics is in the house!! No need for the traditional field trip to MOOD which will save time and presumably money (I didn't notice anyone actually paying for their yardage so I'm guessing it was on the house). Tim arrives in his familiar wise mentor fashion which always sends a warm feeling spreading across my chest. Among Tim's workroom progress comments are some gems: Gaah "Good heavens!", "Is it sexy or is it vulgar?", and the winner of the week:"The cap sleeve worries me"...Like a creepy doctor, Jason (with cocky hat in tow) is distracted by his model's unusually large bust, Peach's garment looks like it's out to lunch rather than fit for a lady who lunches, and Casanova's model is almost completely nude save for a bikini and a sarong hanging by a thread...

This could only be Tim laughing out loud at Casanova's lack of fabric yardage

Mondo concentrates on sketching. Love his spotted bandana btw

And now it's Runway time and it's sure good to see Michael Kors and Nina Garcia back with fresh tans and pedicures, sitting alongside guest judge Selma Blair, sometime actress and permanent surly face (although she does know a thing or two about fashion). Coming down the runway I am loving Andy South's pants outfit which looks pretty amazing, and I LOVE sustainably green Gretchen's beautiful and effortlessly flowy black dress with beaded cap sleeves. Everything else was a blur of garbage bags and cheap taste, most notable being Jason's 'deconstructed' backwards kimono which was stapled and pinned into a drab mess of one ugly bathrobe. Nina's nose couldn't help but flare disapprovingly at the enormous amount of messes coming down the runway. Meanwhile we aren't yet sure how many designers are going home tonight, but according to my calculations for awfulness it must be at least 9... and yep! Heidi announces that the entire group of 6 designers still standing after the first 11 leave the runway, are ALL in the bottom. No one is safe. So who's design is the least offensive tonight?
Let's try and guess via some of the judges' comments:
"She looks like an '80's streetwalker"- Nina on April's Deconstructed (aka unfinished) Tux
"That is Butt ugly"- an eloquent Heidi on McKell's cute but tastefully questionable dress
"She's a pole dancer in Dubai"-Michael Kors on Casanova's scantily clad model. Brilliant. Love it! Twist #4: Nina blurts out some perfectly sexy Spanish in her smooth Colombian accent, and I can tell this is going to be a very different season of Project Runway. Twist #5: The judges are curiously united in appreciation for Casanova's 'fascinatingly bizarre' (aka trashtastic) look, and its clear the producers were buzzing in the judges' earpieces as they too are bizarrely fascinated with Casanova (as I had predicted), and so his awful nostalgic ode to Jennifer Lopez and that green Versace dress from 2000 is, against all common fashion sense, safe. Someone please explaaaaaaaaaaaiiin......!!!
Thankfully the judges were also unanimous in crowning Gretchen the clear winner! The Portland, OR native clearly deserved it. So until next week, stay tuned for more RedPoppy Recaps, thought, and twists on the next episode of Project Runway...
xo

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